My Journey: Week 2 With My Life Coach & EQ Guru Jen Groover02/14/2019
| 6 Min Read |
In my last post, I wrote about how my life coach Jen Groover prescribed a full-on negativity detox. If you missed it, you can catch up here.
Jen sent me lots of Wayne Dyer videos this week – Wayne says – “You become what you think about.” If you’ve studied anything on the law of attraction or even watched/read the movie/book The Secret, you may remember that energetically what you put out into the world, what you think about, is, energetically what you will receive – like one big magnet. So, if you’re thinking about things you lack or things you don’t like, energetically you are vibe-ing about lacking and things you don’t like and will, therefore, receive more lack and things you don’t like. Conversely, thinking about positivity, abundance, and love will bring you more positivity, abundance, and love. You become what you think about. That week I got really careful about everything I thought about.
I cut out all things negative – negative people, negative TV shows, even songs with negative lyrics. I’ll never forget sitting in my car while the song “Tell Me You Love Me” by Demi Lovato came on – “you ain’t nobody ‘til you got somebody.” I caught myself singing the lyrics. Wait… what?… I ain’t nobody ‘til I got somebody…. Um no. No disrespect Demi, but no. My husband is great and all, but I am someone all on my own thank you. I quickly switched the station and tuned into more of Jen’s positive audio tracks.
I literally turned off anything and everything that was negative – even things that seemed harmless like lyrics from a pop song – even if that meant rushing off the phone with family members or close friends that focus on drama and negativity. I wasn’t trying to be mean or abandon them in a time of need; I just knew that, in this healing part of my journey, my mindset and fixing myself was my priority and I was laser focused.
As days went by, I literally felt like I was floating on clouds. I felt great in every aspect of my life – my home life, my social life, work life – all of it. The interesting thing is that, in those short 2 weeks, nothing in my outside world had changed. I had the same job with the same people, I still had a lack of time, lack of financial freedom – all of it was still there. Yet, I was a completely different person. “You become what you think about.” Yep. I totally get it. In two weeks, I shifted my mindset and got so busy being grateful and stuffing my head with positivity that I completely forgot about all of the wants and wishes. It was that simple. I’m not saying that changing your mindset is simple by any means. But here I was, all this time, thinking that something on the outside (which I had no control over) had to change in order for me to be this happy. All along the answers were within, like a light switch waiting to be turned on.
My daughter Giovana who was 6 at the time was in first grade. She started to wonder what happened to her mommy that was suddenly constantly throwing positive affirmations at her. “Okay, okay, mommy I know.” Every night before we went to sleep, I would sit by her bed and ask her to repeat me, “I am confident.” “I am brave.” “I am successful.” “I am smart.” “I am kind.” “I am beautiful.” I noticed that the first few times this was super uncomfortable for her. I thought, if we become what we think about then I better make sure my kids are thinking great things about themselves. I made sure we did this every night until she eventually got comfortable screaming each and every one. I felt like not only was this practice making me a better person, but it was making me a better mommy.
That week, we received a huge affirmation from the universe. Giovana’s elementary school was getting ready for field day. She was Team Yellow. So, like every other over the top mother, I headed to Michael’s to buy her all things yellow. Yellow tutu, yellow color hair spray, yellow socks, yellow face paint – you name it – if it was yellow, we bought it. The morning of field day was filled with exciting and nervous energy. As we were getting ready, she told me a story, “mommy, my friend, who is also team yellow, was talking about field day and she said that there was no way we were going to win.” I sat wracking my brain for a positive response as she paused. Then she quickly continued, “then mommy, I looked at her and said, you can’t think like that! If you think like that then we will lose. You have to think that we are going to win, and we will!” The sky’s opened up and I think I heard angels singing. SHE was listening. Not only had I been changing my own mindset these last few weeks, but I was also gifting my children with these new life lessons. I was so excited, “That’s right Giovana, you become what you think about.” As she left for school that day all I could think about was, dear lord please let this child win so that this lesson won’t go south. The universe, and team yellow, came through that day and they won first place. Insert a million dancing and cartwheel emoji’s.
That week, in particular, was an amazing week – it’s so crazy to even think back and believe that this was ONLY one week considering all the huge transformation that was made. It’s also important to note here that everywhere I went I saw the number 8 or 28. The number 8 and 28 have always been significant to me. I was born on 8.28.1982 (dear future self, please forgive me for revealing my birth year for all to know), and so, when the numbers 8 and 28 showed up in life I paid attention. Everywhere I went, and I mean everywhere I went, I saw those numbers. At the grocery store, “That will be $80.88.” “What time is it? – it’s 8:28.” “What number is my spa locker? 28.” “Hotel room number? 628.” It happened so frequently that it was hard to ignore, and I started to expect it. I started believing that seeing those numbers were like receiving a metaphorical high five from the universe. I took it as a sign that I was right where I was supposed to be and that everything would continue to be amazing. I know, this may sound crazy, but it gave me a sense of peace, a sense that everything was right where it was supposed to be. It allowed me to let go of control, lose the anxiety and take one step at a time.
That week I was trying to get a connect at L’Oreal for a project I was working on. That Saturday I woke up extra early to get a spot in the circuit training class at the gym. I was there a good 15 minutes before the class started and sat in my spot stretching. Class started at 8:30 AM and I happened to check the time right at 8:28 AM. “Yep, high five universe.” My old self would have been on her cell phone counting down the minutes for class to start, avoiding eye contact with everyone in the room. The new me was aware and open for opportunities – waiting for mini signs from the universe. As I held my head up and smiled, I noticed a woman across the room smiling back. She walked over and said, “you look so familiar.” And I responded, “really? I work in the beauty industry; do you work in the beauty industry?” She responded, “yes, actually. I work for L’Oreal.” I literally had goosebumps on my arms. Yes, universe, I am listening. Now, I had literally attended that class 100 times that year. Never once had I met this woman. That was the day I promised myself to never stop paying attention. To always be present and watch for those mini windows and doors of opportunity that present themselves every single day. At the gym, at the grocery store, at Starbucks even at the car wash. Are you paying attention?
Things that clicked for me
1. Always be present. I know people throw this around all the time but being present means seeing little miracles every day. It’s realizing all the moments that have to align for you to be at the grocery store at the same time as someone you were meant to bump into. It means listening to the numbers you see and really tuning into the channel that guides you to the place that you were meant for.
Exercise: Detox of all things negative. Seriously. I know this was the exercise in my last post because that’s how big it is. No negative TV, no negative music. Feel like relaxing to some TV after work – tune into one of Wayne Dyers YouTube videos. Make positivity and inspiration your priority. That means if someone calls to complain, think of a reason to get off the phone – it doesn’t matter who it is – even if its family. Visualize positivity filling your head as white smoke and negativity as black smoke. Your mind only has room for so much – do you want to fill it with white or black smoke?
Stay tuned for the next post about our journey.
I was 35 years old, on my second home with my handsome loving husband and two small, beautiful kids. I had a pretty active social life and close, loving friends. I had worked my way up as a marketing director and head of education for a well-known company in the beauty space. This all sounds amazing, so, what is the problem? I had old built-up insecurities, low self-esteem and a feeling of being unsuccessful despite my prestigious role with my then current company; I felt like while I was giving my all at my workplace and making a visible impact, I was feeling underappreciated, overlooked and disempowered.
I was in a place in my life where, while everything seemed ok, they actually weren’t. I was living in a world of routine and wishes; wake up, drop kids at school, work, pick kids up, home, cook, homework, clean, showers, send more emails, bed; wishing for more financial freedom, wishing for more time with my family and wishing for a deeper sense of fulfillment. It was then that I started digging for more and started the journey that forever changed our lives. The journey included digging deep into my emotional past, changing my mindset, and jumping into the world of emotional intelligence. This journey completely changed the trajectory of my life and I am forever grateful. My hope, through my story, is to inspire you to transform yours.